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[FIC] Unpleasantries 
21st-Apr-2010 03:16 am
wilhelm scream

Characters: Conrad, Worth
Summary: Conrad does some late night laundry.
Rating: M I guess for language mostly.
Notes: This was actually originally supposed to be it's own thing, but then it decided it wanted to be a part of Unpleasantries. Sorry to be leaving you in the lurch again. I'll try to get this to a decent place I swear. Also, as far as I know I made up Worth being a scout, and I mean no offence to anyone who is/was a scout by calling them gay.

Part 1.
Part 2.
Part 3.


If asked, Conrad would tell you this wasn't exactly how he planned his life to turn out, although he doubted anyone planned for having their condo taken over by a vampire in bat form only to get killed by said vampire when the paranormal investigator you hired broke a curse on them to turn them back into their human form, and then have the paranormal investigator turn you into a vampire.
Some adjustments were easier than others, being a freelance graphic designer meant he could easily take conference calls, or arrange personal consultations at his condo in the late afternoon/early evening.
Shopping was easy enough since you can buy pretty much everything online.
Something he didn't think about until he needed one were repairmen. From his limited previous experience with them he knew it was hard enough to get a hold of them in the day time, and he quickly found getting one in the middle of the night was pretty much impossible.
So peeved, and loaded like a pack mule Conrad found himself at the closest Laundromat to his condo. Back when he was alive he never dreamed of using a Laundromat, especially late at night; All the people he'd seen in them so late were always pretty seedy looking.
When he arrived to the deserted, echoing place he wasn't sure if the seedy looking people would make it more or less uninviting than it seemed right now.
Trying his best not to think about it Conrad attacked his laundry with as much vigour as he could muster, sorting and loading his clothing items into the machines.
Once he had everything set and the machines running Conrad sat across one of the benches, back against the wall, feet up, and Macbook on his lap; He brought it along with him because he figured he may as well get some work done while he waited for his washing to get done.


"Ha! Do ya ever go any where wivout that thing?" Came a crackled voice from the doorway.
Of course it figured that the first person Conrad would see in this is Worth. God, or whoever was in charge of everything, obviously hated him. 'Please, please, please don't mention the coffee shop.' Conrad repeated to himself like a mantra.
"Considering what I do for a living I find it convenient to have it with me," Conrad finally said with a patronising tone. "And if you don't mind some of us have a real job to be doing so go away."
"Tch. The world don' revolve around you yer know." Worth baited, and held up a dingy sack. "Got some laundry to do."
Snorting, Conrad raised an eyebrow. "I find it hard t believe you even know how to was clothes."
"An' I find it so gratifying that you've deigned us mere mortals wiv yer presence in our humble Laundromat." Worth gibed. "Always 'ad you pegged fer a dry-cleaner kinda guy."
"Not for everything, no." To anyone else Conrad's short reply would mean that he had things to do and would prefer less chit-chat, but Worth of course took it to mean the complete opposite.
"Oh, an' you don't 'ave a machine of yer own?"
"Of course I bloody do, it's fucking broken. Have you tried getting a repairman at this time of night?" Conrad snapped wishing the uncertified Doctor would just shut up and wash his clothes in silence, and hating himself for raising to the bait, yet again.
"Better watch you don' break that." Worth pointed out Conrad's current death grip on his Macbook. "I'd imagine all yer yuppie fag gadgets ain't cheap."
"Can't you just fucking shut up?!" Worth's gleeful grin at Conrad's outburst just irritated him more, and Conrad set about doing his best to ignore the commentary Worth provided while he loaded his own laundry into the spare machines. He was doing quite well, that is, until Worth sat down on the bench next to him, and looked him over.
"What?" Conrad begrudgingly grumbled.
"Ye know it's a bit rude t' sit wiv yer feet on the seats."
Conrad couldn't believe what he was hearing. He was getting told by the rudest person he'd ever met that he was being rude. "I find it incredulous that you of all people are giving me a lecture on rude behaviour. I bet you just said that cause you can't sit with your feet up."
This caused the Doctor to double over with laughter. Conrad found Worth's laugh to be an unnerving cackle that you were never sure was aimed at you, what you said, or both.
"Yer alright pup." Worth said when he was more under control and swung his legs up across the bench alongside Conrad's, causing the young vampire to shift a bit in a futile attempt to not be touching Worth in anyway.
They settled into and awkward kind of silence only caused by one person trying to pretend the other doesn't exist and that their legs aren't touching, and the other being utterly amused by it all.


There was a scuffle of movement as Conrad found a place to sit his Macbook and clear his legs of Worth's when his washing finished and he went to load it into the dryer.
While Conrad was occupied on the farther end of the room Work had a look over what was up on the his screen.
"Are ya sure you needed this for work?" Worth asked, noting that Conrad had been playing freecell. "It's not some sort of fag security blanket or nufin'?"
"I finished my commission." Conrad rolled his eyes. "Don't you dare mess up my game."
"Heh, easy princess." Worth's tone told Conrad he was laughing at him. "Wouldn' dream of it. Scout's honour an' everythin'."
"Scouts honour. Ha!" Conrad muttered. "I find that hard to believe."
"Was in the scouts when I was a kid." Worth's voice coming from right behind him had startled Conrad, he hadn't heard Worth move. "Nice underwear."
"Would you stop that?" Conrad snapped snatching a pair of black boxer-briefs out of Worth's hands. "I'll probably have to re-wash these now."
Undeterred, and ignoring all Conrad's protestations Worth kept looking through Conrad's washing making comments on his clothing style.
"An' you say yer not gay." Worth said looking over a hot pink t-shirt that had an Isopod saying 'I feel pretty' on the front.
"You're too damn stupid to get the humour," Conrad snapped tugging the shirt out of his hands. "And you're not one to talk, you were in the scouts."
"Wot about the scouts?" Worth said in a mock offended way.
"Oh please, boys in the woods, those tiny shorts, what's not gay about the scouts?"
"Never said it wasn't gay," Worth had a grin like the cheshire cat. "Learnt a few innaresting things in th' scouts." He added, crowding Conrad.
"Uh, really? Well, that's. That's nice." Conrad stammered, feeling trapt with only a hot pink t-shirt to protect him.
"Learnt a few good tricks wiv a knife," Worth's breath ghosted over Conrad's face. "An' I learnt how to tie knots tha' no-one could get out of."
Conrad found himself floundering. Not only had what Worth said caused a weirdly familiar tug of feeling in his lower abdomen, but for some crazy reason he wanted Worth to do it again; Naturally he'd prefer someone else, but Worth was what he had at the moment. At least, that's what he told himself when he shifted the angle of his face and his lips brushed against Worth's stubbled cheek and found the older man's dry lips.
It was at this point Conrad wasn't really sure what to do next, and he was sure Worth knew it, and could easily deduce why. Conrad had never wanted to kiss anyone before, he didn't even really realise until he'd just done it that he had wanted to kiss Worth, so naturally he'd never actually dated anyone, not that he had much time for that with how often his Mother dragged him to the Doctors. 'Oh god,' he panicked. 'This isn't some sort of childhood trauma thing is it?'
Conrad quickly pulled away from Worth, wide-eyed and bewildered, stammered some sort of apology and left Worth holding his t-shirt; Abandoning his laundry and Macbook as he fled.

Geeze drama queen much Conrad? *sigh*

20th-Apr-2010 08:44 pm (UTC)
FUUUUUCK, Connie, you really are a pitiful puppy aren't you.
21st-Apr-2010 02:03 am (UTC)
I really don't know what it is about the poor boy. He's a sad little thing.
22nd-Apr-2010 07:43 pm (UTC)
Woooow, fail Conrad.

The banter here is well written, the comments on the boyscouts and Conrad's shirt are kind of fantastic.
23rd-Apr-2010 12:49 am (UTC)
Aw, thank you so much. I seriously feel I fail so much at conversation so I'm pretty happy to hear at least someone thinks it's not that bad. :)
11th-Jun-2010 11:14 am (UTC)
I see a QC t-shirt reference. Hurp durp.

Conrad is rather fail but is like a flustered puppy, really. <3
12th-Jun-2010 08:42 am (UTC)
Haha yeah. It's my favourite QC shirt.

He's the first failpire to be cool.
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